Sometimes it’s all about the truth in a caption. Thanks Ryan Muirhead for keeping it real and sharing your heart.
While in Amsterdam @tisjadamenlingerie asked if Rachel and I would shoot for her lingerie line. For me this is a little more complicated than it might seem. I’m never quite sure how my images come across, but “sexy” is something I’m almost never going for when trying to communicate a feeling. Bigger than that however is something I really struggle with, and that is that I feel incapable of making an image FOR someone. I either feel something, or don’t. See something to say, or don’t. For me there is very little ability to take direction or collaborate. All I know is how to shoot what I feel. When more is added to that, a necessity to show this or that, I basically fall apart. It may be reactionary to things in my past, but when told I have to do something artistically, I become less capable than a photo 101 student. This struggle has made it very difficult to put myself out there as a photographer for hire, and why I have mainly tried to support myself with teaching and print sales, so that I can continue to shoot 100% for me. I know this way of working is for everyone, but when my work doesn’t feel personal, honest and important to something I’m going through, I start to hate and resent it. I’m more scared of losing personal art than anything.
With all of that in mind and a promise that I could shoot anything I saw whether it showed off the product or not, I gave it a try. I’ll share a few from that shoot over the next little bit. So here is what a Ryan Muirhead lingerie shot looks like I suppose.